From Hong Kong’s Ministry Of Silly Walks


After years of muffled information in Cantonese, Mandarin and a strange version of English droning out of the equally muffled sound system at Hong Kong Airport, it’s decided to hire actor Morgan Freeman to make all announcements in English.

In some forward thinking, Mr Freeman also narrates some of his favourite stories to ease the pain of tourists walking aimlessly through the airport for hours on end to various testing and holding centres before being herded into a shuttle bus and finally shackled inside a quarantine hotel for a week.

Hey, WORLD! Welcome to the buzz and good vibes of Hong Kong!


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To show that he’s a Man Of The People, Chief Executive John Lee attends press conferences in shorts and flip flops and asks to be addressed as either “Johnny” or “John Boy”. As he enters every press conference, this video plays.


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Family Purton are extremely unhappy when the camels they adopted during their holidays in Dubai are not allowed to stay with them during their mandatory quarantine period in a Hong Kong hotel.


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To lessen the fear of those in quarantine hotels being visited by health officials dressed like astronauts three times a week for more testing, they appear at the door dressed like clowns and perform various magic tricks.


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Instructions on all the Do’s and Don’ts when forced into a quarantine hotel are reduced from 240 pages to a more succinct 198 pages.

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Former Hong Kong Chief Executive Carrie Lam forms her own public relations company called Happiness And Smiley Communications. Business is slow. Very.


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The short film “Lost In A Quarantine Hotel In Hong Kong” filmed on an iPhone wins awards throughout the world and puts Hong Kong on the map again.


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Gary Moore returns to Macau in triumph by not only continuing his training career there, but also taking over the reins of the Macau Jockey Club and positioning it as The Moore Fun Racing Club with zero masks and no social distancing measures.


It’s a runaway success. As is the always popular Gary.


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A remake of “Blade Runner” is filmed in Hong Kong purely for budget reasons- a ready made deserted city with zombie like people.


Also planned by many filmmakers is to use Hong Kong as a location for a number of horror movies.



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